Fuck You, Minnesota!

I apologize for the explicit language in the title.

No I don't. I'm pissed. And here's why.

James, Isaac and I headed to the lake on Thursday. We waited for my brother, Derek, to get off work so he could ride with us and wouldn't have to take a separate car. So we were getting into Cass Lake somewhere around 8:30 or 9:00 PM because we didn't end up leaving until 6:30 PM. We passed the town of Cass Lake and were so very close to Norway Beach, where my parents had been camping since Tuesday, when I saw flashing lights behind me. I checked the speedometer. I was going 60 mph. I then realized that I had no clue what the speed limit was. It was 65 mph on the highway that we'd been on for the past hour and a half. Evidently it changed, because I was getting pulled over.

The officer was so kind to inform me that the speed limit changes for about a mile right by the town of Cass lake. It goes from 65 to 45 (for literally like, a mile) and then goes back up to 60. I had been caught in a speed trap. The cop tells me he clocked me in at 70 mph. Bullshit! I instinctively checked my speed as soon as I saw his car. I was going 60. Whatever. It wasn't going to do any good arguing with him. I'd probably just get myself into more trouble. Besides, I was speeding.

So then Officer Dipshit writes me up a ticket and tells me that he "bumped my speed down as much as he could." He wrote that I was going 55. Then wrote a phone number on it, which I was supposed to call in order to get my fine amount. I know Minnesota has some steep fines. I remember hearing something like $80. Dang. That sucks big time.

We got to the camp and I grabbed my cell phone (which took about 15 minutes to find because it had fallen out of the cupholder in my car) and called the number. I wanted to see what the damage was going to be.

Here's what greeted me on the other end of the line:

"The number you are trying to call has been changed or disconnected."

You've got to be kidding me. Deputy Duchebag gave me the wrong number. What the hell am I supposed to do now? So I went online and found the number for the police department. I called it first thing Friday morning. The person I talked to gave me a different number to try. I tried it. They gave me another number. Ugh. So I dialed that number and got a series of automated options. I pressed 4 to find out my fine amount. Then it asked me for some info off my ticket. I put it in. Then it said that their computer was down at the moment. So I did it all again and pressed 0 for assistance. Guess what? "Sorry, but there is no one available to assist you at this time. Please try again later."

All damn weekend I was trying to get my stupid fine amount. Of course, no luck.

So today I tried it again. I pressed 4. It gave me a busy signal. I tried again. It rang, and then said "all circuits are busy."

So I called the PD back. They told me to call the number that I'd been calling since Friday. I told him that it didn't do me any good. He said "Well, I don't know the amounts (yeah right) so I can't help you."

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I called the number back and pressed 2 this time, even though it wasn't even remotely close to what I needed. I just didn't know what else to do! It rang, and an actual person answered. Now maybe we're getting somewhere! I explained to her what I'd been going through for the last four days. She asked me what my speed was and what the limit was and informed me that my fine would be $125.

I want to cry.

Thank you, Minnesota, for wasting four days of my life and taking a giant bite out of my budget. I hate you.